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01-Mar-2016 07:14

You might be resistant to doing things differently, but remember, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.

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I’m out of material.” I suffered through my fair share before meeting my boyfriend a year ago.Yet only later did I realize that all that effort – and even frustration – helped me gain a lot more than a good man.You can approach dates thinking “This is never going to work! Falling in love is a mysterious process over which you have little control.” or “This is another human being who I have a chance to connect with, even on the smallest level.” These honed social skills pay off with friends, colleagues, strangers on a plane and your cousin’s new girlfriend at Thanksgiving. When you’re trying to find love, the last thing you want to hear is “I don’t think we’re a romantic match, but I’d like to be friends.” Granted, it’s hard to be friends with someone you’re crushing on. I’ll forever admire my friend Kevin who following a ho-hum Mexican brunch said, “I’m new to the city, and I’m trying to expand my social circle. I learned the proper way to eat buffalo wings and Vietnamese noodle soup. But you do have control over giving yourself the best shot at finding it: Writing a good profile, posting new photos, answering emails, keeping a positive attitude and yes, showing up again and again to meet new people. If you can pull this off with something as fickle and elusive as romance, you can do this in every other area of your life. Sarah Elizabeth Richards is a journalist and the author of Motherhood, Rescheduled: The New Frontier of Egg Freezing and the Women Who Tried It.

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I grilled dinner at my table at a Korean barbecue restaurant.

Have you ever met someone you're romantically interested in, only to kick yourself later because you think you blew your chance?



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