Drug addict dating


29-Oct-2015 01:26

Men and women learn a lot in recovery, not just about staying sober but living a happy, satisfying life.

They don’t need to be taken care of; they learned how to do that for themselves.

Some are deeply spiritual people whose lives are infused with meaning and purpose, while others volunteer in their communities or have interesting hobbies that keep them grounded.

Because recovery is a lifelong process, recovering addicts are in a perpetual state of self-improvement.

Despite having a thorny past, recovering addicts can be some of the healthiest, most put-together individuals you’ll meet – with a few important stipulations.

First, the recovering addict should have at least one year of sobriety, and preferably many more.

Recovering addicts don’t expect perfection in their partners, having learned firsthand that it doesn’t exist.

And they have committed – in recovery and in life – to honesty and integrity and making decisions in accordance with their values.

They have learned critical relationship skills, including how to identify, process and communicate their emotions and to set personal boundaries while respecting the lines drawn by others.

Sometimes Love Just Ain’t Enough Just as important as assessing the recovering addict’s status is understanding your own. Does addiction strike a nerve with you, perhaps because there’s an addict in your family?

After dating one dud after another, you finally find someone who seems to have it all – thoughtful, witty, responsible – and good-looking to boot.

Then they drop a bomb: “I used to be a drug addict.” They may as well have said, “I’m married.” But does one partner being in recovery automatically spell doom for a relationship?

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Second, they should be actively working a program of recovery – attending meetings, volunteering, practicing self-care and so on – not just begrudgingly staying away from drugs and alcohol while addictive patterns fester.

These provisos are in place to give addicts a fair shot at lasting recovery and to protect the people they might date from falling for someone who is unhealthy, unavailable or worse.